Irvine Tops Monday’s Golf Ghouls

Our Monday golf group struggled in the wake of an “event” that was given course access during our normal tee times. I haven’t a clue as to what the “event” might have been, but based upon the pace of play, I suspect it was a contingent of the AQGA (American Quadriplegic Golfers Association). The unalterable “cart path only” rule had to be tough on those guys.  We members had tee times going to a quarter past one in the afternoon. With winter solstice less than two months away and slow play in the heart of the field, we finished at the time the night stalkers hunt for their prey. As we finished, we could see the glowing red eyes of Jimmy Gabriel in the distance behind the last green.

Skyler Irvine had one of his best rounds ever and beat the field with a net 65. Here’s a picture of Skyler making a sixty foot putt on the final hole to cap his great round. It was his third sixty footer in a row. Of course, we had to rely on his word because no one had actually seen him since the 15th hole when Nick De Santis lit a match briefly casting some light on the tee box.

Howard Garr finished second with a net 69 and Nick De Santis came in third at net 71. Mike Forde was lost in action. We heard the sound of an angry goose and something flailing about in the lake, but we assumed that if it was Forde, he was a good swimmer in college and he’d find his way home.

Nearly all of the money went home with Irvine and De Santis. A paltry sum escaped with Howard Garr, but the rest of us were net contributors. Sandy Wiener won the coveted “Sponsors Trophy” as the largest loser contributor.

Author: h. Alton Jones

writer/scientist/adventurer

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